Sunday, April 22, 2007


Returning back to Sweden has been quite different from what I expected. I think I have spent all of my life chasing something. Now I realize how important it is for me to have that something in front of me to chase. It might have been getting that degree, learning those languages, getting to those places... Now that I've come back again, and more out of need than anything else, have started to work, I really feel SO BORED. Constantly. From the bottom of my heart. It was already starting when I felt that my stay in China was starting to get too long and frankly, too pointless.

Having started to watch a lot of TV and endlessly surf the web have also taken it's toll. I think everything I ever read on the web I have probably forgotten all by the next day. That fact that I write this at all is probably a good sign that I'm waking up from this. Hopefully I will have enough will-power to start moving again. Guess I've been waiting for the spring to set out for a new start. With a fresh injection of money, some sunshine and the first paid vacation in my life, I think I might be ready to start heading in a new direction.


Allan said...

i really think you are capable of doing lots of fantastic things because of the knowledge and insights you have. having enough money injected in your pocket, i think you will feel less pressure on your should to find something you are really interested in.

best wishes!

Johan said...

Hi Allan!
Thx for the encouragement! :)

I'll be fine. I'm just a spoiled waining baby.

Edward said...

You spoiled waining baby!

Did you have to do that to me? Now I'm even more worried about what the heck is gonna happen to me after my "pretending to be a millonaire travelling the world" years will be over. :-(